The Cruise of the Cadis by Raymond S Read online

  Munsey’s Magazine, February, 1906

  The Cruise of the Cadis

  by Raymond S. Spears

  R. ALVIN EATON walked with a

  approached him from behind. Prancing up and lonely and dejected air along that

  down, the old fellow shook his hand violently.

  M wide thoroughfare of New Orleans The monkey had nipped his thumb. The where one meets so large a wild-eyed little beast looked appealingly past its proportion of beautiful young ladies and tormentor to Mr. Eaton. Noticing the animal’s handsome old men. Suddenly his face gaze, the man turned, and cut short his brightened. It was not the smile of a friend that objurgations.

  banished the ache from his heart, nor was it a

  “Ah, mossierf! ” he cried apologetically, congenial “howdy.” It was a shrill cry from a

  “ze little pet of me, et ees so confus’ mit les side street toward the levee, a voice with a dents. I fix um! Mon dieu! Le monk, he ver’

  strident note in it, such as might proceed from a savage. Have me ze honor —eh, what?”

  throat of brass. Mr. Eaton’s face lighted up as Mr. Eaton had moved his hand

  he listened; his step quickened; and he eagerly impatiently. He could not bear monkeys, much traced the sound to its source—a parrot of less the sleepy guinea-pigs and white mice with dull-gray plumage and one solemn eye; for a which the rear of the store was chiefly

  drooping lid veiled the cavity which had been populated. He drew his coat close around him, designed for the companion orb.

  and hastily retreated toward the door. Among As Mr. Eaton approached, the parrot,

  the birds there he was more comfortable.

  having scanned him critically from between two

  “You have parrots?” he asked casually,

  bars of the battered brass cage, called at him in as one who knew animal-dealers to the bottom a low, derisive voice:

  of their hearts, and how best to deal with them.

  “Old maid! Old maid! Always been an

  “Yeh! Yeh, mossieu! Parrots

  old maid! Heigh-ho! Heigh-ho! Scat!”

  galoriously! See! A lit’ Brazilian parrot. He talk Mr. Eaton grinned ecstatically. Without

  like—like” —he hesitated a moment as he

  more ado, he entered the doorway under the scanned Mr. Eaton— “he talk like a lit’ angel.

  cage, passed on between tiers of cages full of He converse ver’ lady-like.”

  evil-smelling, shrieking creatures with worn Seeing that Mr. Baton’s eyes wandered

  pelts and bedraggled plumage, till, far in the among the other birds, the dealer enlarged on rear, before a dusty window, he found a lean the charms and attainments of the various little man trying to pull a monkey’s tooth. The members of his stock. Some sang, some were monkey was tied to the back ,of a chair, hand beautiful, some did stunts on ladders, and some and foot, waist, neck, and even jaws. played ball with wads of paper. But not one Nevertheless, it could wiggle and protest, and it word did he say about the gray bird with one did.

  eye that hung in front of the store. At last, The owner of the shop burst into a series apparently slightly disgusted, Mr. Eaton nodded of maledictions in a mixture of French, Cuban, toward One-Eye—for so he had already dubbed Spanish and English as the visitor, unnoticed, the bird.

  . Munsey’s Magazine

  2

  “Where’d you get that thing?” he asked.

  or reposing in broad low chairs and cozy

  The dealer shrugged his shoulders.

  corners. Far astern a cat fight was going on in

  “One darn sailor-man. A year, two year

  the after cabin, toward which the steward made now, I feed dat bird. He don’t talk. I tell de trut’, haste when the sounds of conflict reached his he jes’ holler. My golly! I put him in here—

  ears.

  parbleu! He scare de canary, he screech. De The parrots, on seeing Mr. Eaton, began

  monk’, dey can’t sleep. I sell him ver’ quick—

  to walk sideways toward him, to fluff up their cheap—twenty-fife dollar, eh? I let him go fo’

  feathers, and to hail him with strangely

  feefteen dollar, yeh?”

  incongruous greetings.

  “Done!” said Mr. Eaton.

  “Come ’ere! Come ’ere! Come’ere!”

  The money was passed over quickly.

  shrieked a score of voices, and then from the The large brass cage came down. A small one cabins came other calls till the yacht echoed was opened, and the gray parrot walked into it with a babel of shrill salutations.

  with an alacrity that should have told the dealer A moment after the steward entered the

  much. Mr. Eaton was going out of the door, and cabin whence issued the sounds of cats in anger, the dealer was bowing low, to conceal his joy a large Tom leaped through an open port and over the transaction, when the parrot said very landed on the deck with a thump of four paws.

  distinctly:

  After waiting a moment to regain his

  “Blamed liar! Blamed liar! Fool! Fool!”

  equanimity, he trotted forward to meet Mr.

  “Eh, what?” screamed the dealer. “You

  Eaton. One of the animal’s ears was split, and talk? Fifteen dollars for a parrot talk like dat?

  the left side of his face was bleeding, but Tom’s Mister! Mister!”

  step was jaunty and his tail pointed straight up, But Mr. Eaton seemed not to hear, and

  save for a fern-like curl at the tip.

  the dealer danced grimacing in the doorway of

  “You naughty Tom!” exclaimed Mr.

  the shop.

  Eaton as the cat walked around, rubbing the top

  “He swear! Mon dieu! He talk like a of his head on the lace-hooks of the man’s pirate—he wort’ a hundert toller—two shoes. “Is Jack hurt?”

  hundert!”

  “Nosseh!” replied the steward. “A bit

  The little man turned back among his

  scratched is all, seh.”

  pets, and soon the pained shrieks of the

  “All right, but you’d better rub a little unfortunate monkey told of vengeance being carbolized vaseline——”

  wreaked.

  “All right, seh!”

  The purchaser of One-Eye, on leaving

  Soon afterward, as Mr. Eaton was

  the shop, hastened to the river front. He went admiring his new parrot, Jack entered the over the levee, and, just below the big Morgan forward cabin, or bird pen, with his mouth wide liner, he boarded a somewhat smaller but far open and his nose crinkling. Time was when more sumptuous boat—to wit, his yacht, a long, people greased cats with tallow, which was broad, deep craft, shining white, and bright with good to a cat’s taste; but carbolized vaseline!

  varnish and polished brass.

  “P-s-s-s!” said Jack disgustedly.

  Here and there along the deck of the

  “Scat, you horrid things!” screamed the

  yacht were cages and stands for birds, and all one-eyed parrot, as the cats, following Mr.

  the birds were parrots. Nor were these the only Eaton, approached. “Bow-wow-wow!

  creatures in evidence. Numbers of cats were Yep-yep-waugh!”

  prowling, ambling, or galloping about the deck, Eleven cats, Jack and Tom foremost,

  The Cruise of the Cadis 3

  leaped for the open ports, and climbed for the course more conducive to the health and

  rigging. As their distended tails disappeared, happiness of his parrots.

  One-Eye imitated a dog fight.

  Recently a je
wel of a cat had wandered

  “Oh, you treasure!” exclaimed Mr. aboard the yacht. Mr. Eaton had recognized it as Eaton, stepping forward as if to embrace his pet.

  a rare animal, in spite of soft-coal smudge. It

  “You’re an old maid. Scat!” exclaimed

  was a Manx, and such a Manx! No soft and

  the bird soberly.

  downy, purring kitten was this, but a creature Mr. Eaton frowned through his smiles,

  broad-shouldered, narrow-hipped, wide-faced, and then, responding to the notice that lunch and heavy-clawed. Mr. Eaton could appreciate a was ready, started to put the bird in the cage.

  purring, velvety kitten, but his love was for cats

  “Go to Halifax!” the bird yelled, flying

  that could fight and parrots that swore. Hence to a perch already occupied by a yellow his joy in the Manx that swaggered up the Brazilian parrot.

  middle of the deck one day, scaring less

  “Kek! Kek! Kek!” Saffron snapped,

  obtrusive cats into a state of slit-eyed fear.

  ruffling up, whereupon One-Eye whacked him

  “A genuine, scrappy Manx!” Mr. Eaton

  on the head with his wing, and Saffron subsided thought; and for three days he cherished the with a shriek.

  happy illusion. But at the end of that time he

  “Watch that pair—don’t let them fight,”

  learned that the cat was a Manx by accident, directed Mr. Eaton as he started for the dining having lost its tail in kittenhood, and not saloon.

  through the right of heredity. Hence the

  “Old maid! Scat!” retorted the stranger

  melancholy mood in which Mr. Eaton had

  parrot, and the steward was glad he had a face paced the streets of New Orleans until the of wax.

  strident cry of One-Eye dispelled his gloom.

  Mr. Eaton did not linger long over his

  Unquestionably, at the time of the acquisition of lunch. He ate rapidly of his salad, tea, light One-Eye, parrots were first in his affections.

  biscuit, and fruit, thinking the while of the The bobtailed cat wandered at will over the treasure he had found in his new pet.

  yacht, bully of all the cats he met, but ignored by Mr. Eaton. The crew, less fastidious as to the II

  animal’s ancestry, loved Bob as a friend and a playmate, and as a fighter capable of routing THE owner of One-Eye had two hobbies—

  half a dozen aristocratic felines whose pedigrees parrots and cats. He himself could not tell which alone might have daunted him. While the

  he loved best.

  steward and the doctor cared for the cats, the

  “I can come within one of it, anyhow,”

  owner of the yacht devoted himself to his birds, he would say to himself whimsically, as he tried feeding them from his own hands with tidbits to decide which he preferred. To reach at least a suitable for parrot crops. At meal times Mr.

  partial decision was necessary frequently, for Eaton was always cheered vociferously by his cats are liveliest north of the parallel of New feathered dependents, the while they crawled Orleans, while parrots are liveliest south of it.

  over him from head to foot, clinging

  This accounted for Mr. Baton’s presence at New right-side-up and upside-down to the

  Orleans. He was undecided whether to go north resplendent dressing-gown of flowered design to St. Louis on the Mississippi, so favoring the which that gentleman affected.

  felines, or to go southward into the blue Gulf, But the yacht was not to remain long at

  along the coasts, and among the islands, a New Orleans. The attention Mr. Eaton and his

  . Munsey’s Magazine

  4

  pets received from steamer roustabouts and

  “Thank you, sir; thank you, sir; thank

  longshoremen who lined the levee was you, sir” —these words Mr. Eaton was annoying rather than flattering. The word to sail repeating to his promising pupil, when an was soon given. The steward laid in a huge ear-splitting, raucous voice broke forth

  supply of crackers and cold storage meats, and profanely:

  the captain cleared the yacht for foreign ports.

  “Darn your eyes, Biddy wants a

  On a splendid golden morning, the yacht

  cracker!”

  Cadis swung out into the great Mississippi The sound was sudden, and Mr. Eaton

  torrent, the bow caught in the current, and the leaped a foot in the air. It was the voice of craft, turning gracefully southward, sped away One-Eye, and his master was not displeased.

  for the tropics, come what might to the tribes of Indeed, he rewarded the brazen-throated bird furry creatures born in cooler climes.

  with a whole sea-biscuit— and so, in an instant, Bob, the Manx, showed signs of anxiety

  undid all the lessons he had taught the lady-like as soon as the tremble of the screw passed parrot, who, looking on with understanding, through the yacht. He licked his chops uneasily, forthwith renounced polite speeches, and took and when, seven hours later, the Cadis ran down forevermore to profanity, which, in the case of Ead’s Pass and dipped to the great Gulf swell, One-Eye, she had seen so bountifully rewarded.

  he looked pained. At the sixth dip, Bob

  Not only on this occasion, but in

  sprawled down on the deck, his fore claws general, One-Eye showed himself a disturbing reaching to right and left, his hind legs drawn spirit. “Yah—scat!” became the war-whoop and up, and his left ear to the varnished wood.

  the cry of distress on the Cadis. Even the sailors

  “Steward! Oh, George!” called Mr. took it up. But the bird’s rough tongue, loud Eaton. “Come take this cat to the hospital—he’s voice, and rude, masterful ways seemed only to sick!”

  endear him to the heart of his owner.

  One-Eye gazed down on the cat.

  After two weeks’ sailing, the yacht was

  “Yah-h-yah-h-h!” he shrieked

  in the west mouth of the Orinoco River. Here maliciously. “Scat!”

  Mr. Eaton cast anchor until he could enlist the Bob, hanging limply over the steward’s

  services of certain netters—Señor Carlos San arm, wriggled feebly as he looked at the bird, Sinbo, Señor Juan de Caribona, and Señor

  and then turned toward the leaping, Antone Jiculan—whose skill was well known to white-capped sea with jaws yawning. The the bird-fanciers of the world. Having found steward carried him below.

  these gentlemen, he addressed them to this Meanwhile Mr. Eaton devoted himself

  effect, in the purest Spanish:

  to cultivating the talents of his bird-friends. As

  “I desire you to make me the honorable

  an incentive to conversation, biscuits were fed favor of capturing young parrots.”

  to the talkative. Under this stimulus, volubility The bird-catchers bowed very low and

  increased rapidly, and even creatures of shy and made motions as though they would ensnare the retiring dispositions developed unexpected whole wilderness for so entirely gracious a conversational powers. Their teacher was señor magnificente, at whose service they delighted with his successes.

  placed their forever humble selves.

  A lady-like little green bird was

  So the Cadis sailed up the delta to the receiving special attention from Mr. Eaton. It main stream, and up the main Orinoco to the had learned to say, “Please, sir, a cracker,” and muggiest, densest, gloomiest wilderness, where was now being taught a new phrase.

  Mr. Baton’s bid for a “really large collection of

  The Cruise of the Cadis 5

  parrots” was in a fair way to being satisfied.

  would never be missed from that “bloomin’

  In the quiet waters of the river, the Cadis chicken ship,” the sailors thought. But they was a gentle boat. Bob, the seasick cat, came up were mistaken—in one case at least—as will from below,
at first timorously, and then with appear,

  increasing confidence as he saw, on all sides, Finally Mr. Eaton was satisfied, and as

  the thick vegetation—a sure sign of land. The the lines were cast off one morning he bade the other cats, though panting with the heat, viewed steward bring One-Eye. The steward found the the scene with similar approbation, even while bird, grim and desolate, on his perch.

  they were not without their doubts at night,

  “Hello!” said that functionary genially.

  when certain large animals of their kind raised The parrot sidled toward him, snapping its bill voices of melodious despair by way of scaring dangerously.

  timid deer from the thickets across the grassy

  “Hold on now!” remarked the steward.

  savannas.

  “You bite me and I’ll wring your neck!”

  Mr. Baton’s parrots, however, were in a

  The anklet and chain that kept the bird

  state of hilarious joy. They approved the heat on the perch were unclasped, and One-Eye

  and the mocking cries of their kin in the forest.

  walked up the steward’s arm to his shoulder and One-Eye, alone, remained silent. He disliked the thence to the top of his head. Mr. Eaton hailed long, bright chain by which he was compelled to the bird as he flapped his wings and flew toward remain on a shiny wooden perch instead of him.

  ambling around at will, as on the days when at At that moment, from a tree on the edge

  sea.

  of the wilderness, came a cry:

  The other birds, too, accustomed to the

  “Kee-e-e! Kee-e-e!”

  freedom of the ship, but now chained fast or

  “Kee-e-e!” answered One-Eye

  caged, voiced their protests with shrieks. ecstatically, and, veering his course, he winged One-Eye was simply sullen. Unlike his his way over the rail and up toward the tree-top companions, he did not forget his woes in from which the call proceeded. As he neared it a observing the loads of parrots, disheveled and bird like himself came from the cover, and screaming, that were brought aboard by the together the two flew into the forest singing in netters. He disdained the common flock, unison one glad song of “Kee-e-e! Kee-e-e!”

  standing glum all day long, turning his back on It was a clear case of love at first sight.

  the preoccupied Mr. Eaton at every opportunity, One-Eye had found a mate whose society he and refusing to be cajoled by sweet crackers, preferred to that of the yacht where he had been chopped cocoanut, or ripe, creamy bananas.